It's beginning to feel like home.

A few weeks ago we crashed the home of a missionary family to spend a little with them before the head back to the States. We have not worked directly with this family but spent three weeks with them last summer in Cross-Training. Like good guests we requested that they pick us up at the bus stop and bring us back to their house to eat their food and sit in their living room. It was lovely.

As we talked about life and ministry our friend asked us a question that I had not given a lot of thought to. ¨When did Spain start to feel like home?¨ For this family it was about the ninth month. Funny enough, they are finishing up a 11ish month term and will be heading back to the States to press play on their lives in Kentucky.

I think at that point (a few weeks ago) we had already began thinking of Spain as home. Earlier I began training myself to stop referring to North Carolina/The States as home. Think what you may about that but, it just didn't seem right to me. Sure, I will always have ¨a home¨ there, but for me, now, Spain is my home.

Sometimes it is a scary thought. Sometimes it's intimidating and frustrating and a lot of other negative emotions. But other times it's beautiful and peaceful and better than I ever imagined. Every time I look out our window or otherwise catch a glimpse of the mountains that surround me almost all the time, I am reminded of the promise that God gave me.

The mountains will sing. 

Sometimes it might be my own single voice singing praises to God. Sometimes others will join and will make a chorus of joyful songs. But God promised me mountains. And to me, that promise is home.

The thing I am not thinking about...

In less than two weeks Jeremy and I will celebrate our third wedding anniversary. Today as I look forward to entering our fourth year of marriage, I really have no idea what it will look like. Many thoughts come to mind, but they are all sort of jumbled together and nothing seems very clear. Except for one thing.

May also marks our sixth month of living in Spain- half of a year. This time last year we were planning for graduation, leaving jobs and heading to Indiana for cross-training. Now, we don't have many specific goals or deadlines pressing. Well, except for getting a valid drivers license in June/July- no biggie. We have residency, we have a car (mostly functioning), we have an apartment and we're working on the whole language thing. 

I have realized something, for the last 7 or so years of my life, I have always been looking forward to something. Something that seemed better or more significant than I had on any given day. An accomplishment, a goal, something ¨bigger.¨ Now, finally, I am living in today.

Jim Elliot, a man who many Christians and missionaries admire, said this-

“Wherever you are, be all there! Live to the hilt every situation you believe to be the will of God.” This quote has stuck with me for years, but not until now have I really taken it to heart. (If you get the chance, read the book ¨Shadow of the Almighty¨)

CS Lewis said, “To walk out of His will is to walk into nowhere.” I fully believe that Jeremy and I are living in the will of God in Spain. And with that said, I can answer the question that many have asked.

As I look into our fourth year of marriage, I do not see us leaving Spain. We are making Spain our home for as long as we can. I mean goodness, I have packed up all my things and moved them 7 times over the last three years- I just don't want to move again!

But really, I believe by this time next year, we will still only be crossing the starting line. There is still much work to be done- I do not believe that God called us here only for two years or even only four years.

I know, I know, you're thinking ¨Sweetie, none of us know what the Lord has planned.¨ And you are right. I don't and neither do you. Right now, I am happy finally embracing a day to day mentality when it comes to my life planning. So here I am, enjoying my new home, and blissfully NOT planning my next pack-up-and-move-everything event.

Life in the Works

Jeremy and I have been in Spain 139 days- almost five months. That number seems crazy. Some ways, it seems too small and in other ways, it seems too big. The first month and a half we spent living in a seminary dorm. The first three months we spent in language school. And March, well, it was something of it's own.

I had hoped that March would be our month of establishment. Establishing ourselves in the town, with the team and as a couple ministering in Spain. That didn't really happen. We finished our time in language school the very end of February. The first week of March we attended our first team meeting and had our first sessions with our tutor (who we love!). The second week we were in Croatia for a retreat/conference/workshop with OMS. We enjoyed time with friends from HQ and missionaries in other European countries. We heard about ministry and work in other fields and we worked as a team to consider our own field. We were home for another week and then I left for Ireland.

Our friend Megan is in Spain for six months with the Algete team and needed to leave the country in order to renew her tourist VISA. We arranged a trip to tour the OMS work in Ireland. It was an encouraging time to spend with her and with experienced missionaries who shared stories of work and life around the world (including Spain!)

Megan and I at the Giant's Causeway, Northern Ireland

Visiting Anne (working with OMS through the Y and Innovista) in Dublin.

But now here we are in April and what are we doing? To be completely honest, some days it feels like a whole lot of nothing. With our limited language we are helping in all the ways we are able. We are generally just trying to get involved in the town. Jeremy is working on a new website for the group. I will be working more with an English group. We walk a lot. We get coffee. Jeremy is taking another Spanish class at a community center. I joined the sports-center and survived my first spin class this morning.
Let's just say, life is in the works.

I sit in my window and look out at a huge, 600 year old monastery seated on the mountain and wonder "how will we change the landscape of this town in such an unmistakable way?" But God has reminded me over and over again of the scripture He gave me when I was 15...

"You will go out in joy
    and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills
    will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field
    will clap their hands." Isaiah 55:12 

Our lives may be in the works, but God's plan is established in Spain and around the world. 

And just like that...

Jeremy and I have been in Spain almost three months. We have dedicated this time to language learning and adjusting to our new home. But really, this is just the beginning. In many ways we are still adjusting and will be "language learning" for many more months. Even though we have learned light years faster than our high school and college Spanish classes, we still have a lot to learn.

I have wanted to share with you a "day in the life" sort of post but really, our days are usually pretty boring. 

6:30- Wake up, eat breakfast, get ready.

7:40- Walk to train station.

7:58- Train leaves station.

8:42- Train arrives in Madrid.

9:00- Walk into school.

9:30- Class starts

11:30- 30 minute break

1:30- Class is over

Possibly stay in Madrid for lunch with friends or for an activity with the school. Or we make our way to the train station and head home.

Some days we have plans for the evening but a lot of days our brains are tired. About once a week now I have a group of kids over to practice English. (Today, I taught the group the word "disappointment."  I was quickly disappointed in myself for teaching them that word.) I have developed a wonderful habit of changing directly into sweatpants as soon as we get home. Actually, I asked our friend Josh the first night of our now weekly Sunday night dinner, if his friend Lucas was coming because if he wasn't, I was wearing sweatpants. Lucas came (and continues to come), I wore jeans. 

I don't know why I told you all that. I'm just really honest. It's a good thing I moved to Spain, the people are really honest here. 

Anyway, the crazy thing is, just as quickly as we have adjusted to this routine, it is coming to a close.

After the last week of this month, our time at language school will end.

Soon our days will look completely different. We will still have language study but instead with a tutor. I am considering taking a class or two at the Cultural Center in El Escorial. This will force me to step out of my Spanish comfort zone and interact with people in the town. Obviously that is why we are here- to interact.

Pray with us as we explore means of meeting people, and building relationships. 

We realize, culturally, that making new friends and building new relationships is different in Spain. But, while the culture is different, the need is the same. People need love. People need grace. People need community. Ultimately, people need Jesus.

Pray that we are aware of these needs everyday. Pray that we are sensitive to specific locations in our town. Pray that the Lord will lead us to new Spanish friends and that He will continue establish a community of people around us. Pray that will be light and life in dark and lifeless places.

Grace and the bad days

Yesterday was not a good day. It was a bad day. Terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day (please tell me you caught my children’s book reference). Like, I went to the bathroom during break and cried for a bit, bad. I was tired, I had a headache and I kept making stupid mistakes in class, bad day.

Some days are great. I can follow conversations with not as much struggle. I can even contribute a few thoughts and sentences. It feels good. I feel good. Confident, almost. I can do this.

Other days, I am exhausted. My head hurts from concentrating so hard on the funny sounding words that keep flowing effortlessly from these people’s mouths. Why do they make it seem so easy? Why is it such a struggle for me to make sense of these sentences? Why is it even harder for me to put together coherent sentences in this language?

Before we came to Spain, almost 2 months ago now, everyone kept saying “Oh it will be so easy!” “You’ll be speaking Spanish in no time!” or the worst, “You already speak Spanish, right?!”

Lies. LIES I TELL YOU!

This is hard. Some days it’s down-right exhausting.

But, each day God teaches me a little more about grace. The grace He has towards me. The grace He has towards others. And the grace I need to show myself.

I have realized exactly why I quit just about every sport, instrument and extracurricular activity I started. I have come to accept my perfectionist tendencies. I hate, hate to be corrected. It’s awful, I cringe inside every time our (wonderful, kind and patient) teacher corrects me. Even over simple things.

But everyday God reminds me that I am learning this language just like everyone else has learned a language. Success and utter failure. Stupid, silly mistake after stupid, silly mistake.  And as much as it pains me to struggle along, it will get better. The words will come more easily with time, practice and grace. Lots and lots of grace.

His grace is sufficient for you. His grace is sufficient for me.

Considering Success 2014

The year 2013 was clearly a year of change and tremendous success. It was a year packed with change. We graduated, we raised support, we drove thousands of miles and finally flew across the ocean to a place we are now calling home.  It seems crazy to think it has already been a year but at the same time it has ONLY been a year. The past twelve month flew by and were packed to the brim. As I look back on the last year, I can see how God was present with us throughout it all.

I very much believe that we arrived in Spain at the perfect time. Satan worked to keep us from getting here (VISA issues, I’m looking at you) and he has worked to discourage and distract us ever since we arrived, but we are looking ahead. We are encouraged because God’s provision has brought us here and His purpose will keep us here.  

So,what will make 2014 a success? Many things come to mind when I think on this question. But God reminds me that He defines success differently. Often times we define success in numbers and achievements. I believe God defines success by purity of intention.

I don’t believe it’s the numbers that please God. I don’t believe it’s the fancy programs or advertising. I don’t believe it’s the method or resource guides that bring glory to God. I believe it is the reasons for which we employ the methods and the means by which we achieve the numbers.

Why has God brought us to this country? What is our purpose here? What will our ministry look like? What milestones will define our success in this ministry?

In short, God has brought us here to be light in a place. Our purpose is to bring Him glory and be evidence of grace to the people we encounter. Our ministry will be simple. Live in the Gospel truth as revealed to us and love people as Jesus loved us. Each person with whom we share Jesus with will serve as marker in our ministry journey.

Simple goals for 2014-

*Spanish- To understand and be understood. Fluency will come with time (a LOT of time) but my goal for this year is to communicate comfortably.

*Live intentionally. Be intentional in meeting people and building relationships. This started with our team and now to our community.

Pray with us as we discover how God will lead us this year.